“I say my morning hellos and head straight to the toilet! Somedays I run there to make things more interesting! There are so many stomach issues out there! All you must do is pick one… or two or three or even four! The world is your oyster!”
Toilet man points at reporter with both hands.
“Maybe you’ve got irritable bowel syndrome on Monday and then maybe you ate some bad shrimp on Tuesday and then maybe you have a new allergy you can’t quite figure out on Wednesday! The explanations are endless! And the questions? None. They’ll get fired trying to fire you! It truly is a blessed world we live in these days!”
Toilet man points to sky and mouths “Thank you”.
“Some of my colleagues have caught on and have decided to join in. We’ve got all the stalls full and even some of the urinals!”
Disgust on reporter’s face becomes very noticeable.
“Oh stop it!” Toilet man continues. “It’s better than going on the floor! And that’s the beauty of it all, we aren’t even using the bathroom! We’re just sitting there, wasting the work day away. Still at the office, just not at our desks. Symantics, sha-mantics!”
